Myles Walker

Hand holding a brown earthworm outdoors.

Fake News: Playground

LAKE STREET ELEMENTARY REGISTER – Mrs. Thornton’s second-grade class has staged several protests since last week concerning controversial actions by Playground President Bobby Blankenburg. Beginning last Tuesday, Bobby has demanded that his classmates bring him all worms and “cool-looking” rocks found during recess. The drama began when JD Thomas found an unusually long earthworm underneath

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Civil rights march with diverse participants.

The Hate That Dare Not Speak Its Name

There’s no debating it: Today’s Republican Party is an extension of the same political tradition (American social conservatism) that once opposed the abolition of slavery and the expansion of civil rights. Today’s Democratic Party is an extension of the same political tradition (American social liberalism) that abolished slavery and expanded civil rights. I don’t point

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Thoughtful man resting his chin on hand.

The Complicated Legacy of Garrett Morgan

Garrett Augustus Morgan Sr., born on March 4, 1877 in Claysville, Kentucky, is a name that comes up often during each Black History Month. The inventor, businessman, activist, and self-proclaimed “Black Edison” is best remembered today as the inventor of an early version of the three-way traffic light. He was a member of the burgeoning

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State Farm advertisement with tagline.

Why Does Jake from State Farm Make Me So Mad?

In 2011, State Farm achieved television immortality with nothing more than a red polo and a pair of khakis. The iconic “Jake from State Farm” insurance mascot was born in a brief thirty-second commercial featuring Jake Stone, an actual State Farm employee from Bloomington, Illinois. Despite the commercial’s instant and enduring success, Stone never reprised

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Man speaking at podium with American flag.

Fake News: State of Emergency

White House insiders revealed Sunday that President John D. Seevers attempted to declare a national state of emergency concerning the threat of anti-white racism. The proposed declaration’s title, “Opposing the Ongoing White Genocide,” refers to the President’s recurring concerns about an alleged large-scale plot to effectively erase members of the white race from the country.

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