On Thursday, The United States Department of Justice declassified information regarding several FBI investigations that have since become topics of national interest. The investigations were carried out from 2014 to 2020 and involve a mysterious Washington, DC-based organization referred to in official documents exclusively as the “response mill.” Representatives from the FBI’s National Press Office have said that whether the organization even has a formal name remains unknown.
The declassified information describes the organization as being run out of a small office building in Washington, DC’s Navy Yard neighborhood. E-mail memos intercepted by the FBI point to the organization’s involvement in what the Bureau has called “response crafting,” or the construction and distribution of “rehearsed political reactions and opinions.” The investigations reveal that the organization has ties to members of many state legislatures, political action committees, and noted political nonprofit organizations like the American Legislative Exchange Council.
Each memo details a prominent political or social topic, a short list of recommended responses and actions to consult when the topic arises, and instructions for how to best disseminate the information in the memo. For example, a memo dated February 4, 2015 was titled “How to React to Disfavorable Politicians.”
“Your most reliable response,” read the memo, “will always be to blame them for rising gas prices. This strategy is virtually faultless, as the cost of gas can always be expected to increase, thereby rendering your criticism forever relevant and well-reasoned. If you are asked to explain precisely how politicians are responsible for changes in the cost of gas, the most efficient counterstrategy is to insist that ‘the government controls everything,’ and the more emboldened of us may include ‘even the weather.’ If you are asked to justify previous statements in light of a recent decrease in the cost of gas, you may kindly reassure your sanctimonious interrogator that it is surely rising somewhere. Alternatively, you may redirect their focus to the inflation of the McDonald’s Dollar Menu.”
A November 16, 2017 memo titled “How to React to Inclusivity” concerned locally enacted measures supported by progressive politicians and organizations.
“Your golden ticket to maneuvering the heavy-handed tyranny of social reform comes in the form of three letters: NAH. NAH stands for the indispensable mantra ‘Never Admit Humanity,’ a guiding principle that is guaranteed to deliver you from the most trying of disagreements. When discussing matters of inclusivity, equality, and tolerance, proponents will often attempt to appeal to your humanity by suggesting that those seeking inclusion are no different from you. Upon hearing this, it is now your time to shine: All you have to do is say NAH! You must under no circumstances admit that the parties in question are the slightest bit similar to you. It is your duty to regard any measure that seeks to install or expand equal rights and opportunities for stigmatized parties as a vicious attack on your personal freedom and sense of security, just as if you were being forced to share public amenities with extraterrestrials.”
Featured image/photo by Katie Moum on Unsplash.